We just started to see the flowers appear on the trees. It’s really the only sign that Spring has sprung in Colorado. We get seasons here but Winter and Summer are the most noticeable seasons, Fall is short and only orange and spring is the 2 weeks that you can smell lilacs and see flowers on the trees (but only in Denver, there is no Spring in the mountains.) However, what comes with March and April in Colorado is the largest snow months of the year.
In recent years I haven’t really minded the snow. I’m not in college nor do I work in downtown Denver so I don’t really have to be out in the snow. And now that I work from home it really doesn’t effect me. While the snow doesn’t have a large effect on me, what does have an effect is Cabin Fever, and I get it bad! (like call an ambulance, this girl has a fever of 110). I’m a type A personality, I plan things to a T and have to be productive always. Sitting on the couch all day, or not changing out of my PJ’s is not being productive in my book (at least for me personally, if that’s you’re thing, Rock on!)
So a snow storm that is promised to be hell means not leaving the house. Therefore, reading an entire book, working on some art projects and trying to distract your boyfriend while he works from home all seem like productive things to do, right? And yet by the end of the snow storm, I feel like I haven’t done anything like my time relaxing and enjoying the things I love (art, reading and that cute boy with the glasses) were all just ways of wasting time.
I’ve always struggled with this feeling. Resting for me is never just resting. I have a hard time just sitting in front of the TV and not half-heartily trying to get something done. I love lists and checking things off of lists and feeling like my load is lighter even if I make up a load that puts weight on me.
Weekends of rest, of doing things you enjoy, catching up on movies or simply just being with the people you love, are all doing something. Quality time with humans, having a creative outlet and immersing yourself in a good story are all things that are good for the soul; that allows you to recharge and be better at life. Recharging is doing something. So these are the things I have to remember when I start going mad inside because I don’t feel productive enough, or like I’m wasting what precious time I have. Just as I am letting go of buying things for the sake of buying things and instead spending money on experiences, I also need to let go of being productive for the sake of checking off random thing on my to-do list that don’t really make a difference and instead see productivity as time spent with loved ones, in recharging and evaluating how happy I am. Because when it comes down to it, evaluating how happy you are in your life is really the key to anything you are doing.
So this week my goals are to have a simple to do list, with plenty of time to do “nothing” by catching up on movies, working on art, immersing myself in a good book, and staring at that really cute guy in the glasses!